INT. L'ASPERCHES UNIVERSITY DORMITORY HALLWAY- DAY

It's "move in" day at L'asperches University, located in 
central New Jersey in an upper-middle class to high-class 
community.  

SIDNEY, a tall handsome eighteen-year-old freshman with 
short hair, is walking down the hallway carrying a TV.  On 
top of the television rests a very small manila envelope 
with his room number printed on it.  It used to contain the 
dorm key, which is now dangling from his hand.

Sidney reaches his destination and starts to slide his key 
into the door when it is suddenly opened from the inside.  
On the inside of the room stands STEVE, also an eighteen-
year-old freshman, medium height and average looking.  Both 
are startled for a brief second.

Steve is sort of a country boy, or at least the persona that 
goes with one- a bit naive and a bit dumb.  Coming from a 
rich family, he dresses preppy.  Though he has siblings, he 
acts more like the selfish only child.

Sidney on the other hand is conservative, a bit more 
practical, and just a whole lot more normal.  He is also 
highly intelligent.  He seems like the sensitive type, like 
he wouldn't hurt a fly.

			STEVE
	Hi.  I'm Steve, your roommate.  You 
	must be Sidney

Steve, standing in the middle of the doorway, extends his 
arm in the friendly gesture of a handshake.  


FADE IN TITLE

ROOMMATES

FADE OUT TITLE

Sidney motions with his eyes the medium sized TV he is 
still carrying which Steve somehow must have missed.

			SIDNEY
		(smiles and jokes)
	Uh, nice to meet you Steve.  Think 
	you can move aside a sec so I can 
	put this down.  It's a journey in 
	itself from the car to the building 
	and then up three flights of stairs.

They both LAUGH.

							CUT TO:

INT. DORM- CONTINUOUS

			STEVE
	Right.  How stupid of me.

Steve steps over to his side of the room.  He has already 
chosen and claimed for his own which bed, dresser, desk, 
chair, and closet he wants (all of which are in better 
condition then those left for Sidney).  As a matter of 
fact, he is already completely unpacked.  Pictures of his 
girlfriend (whom isn't all that attractive) cover the 
wall on his side of the room and his desk.  There is only 
a very small portion of the wall not covered with 
pictures.  He has a small garbage pail near his desk.

Sidney enters the room and looks around.  He places the 
TV on his bed and then turns around to talk with his new 
roommate.

			SIDNEY
	Looks like you're already settled in.

			STEVE
	Yep.  One of the benefits of sports.  
	Got here a week earlier.

			SIDNEY
	I wouldn't know.  Well, I have a lot 
	more to haul up here.  Talk to you 
	later.

			STEVE
	Yeah, alright man.  I was just going 
	to hang out with some of the other 
	jocks anyway.

Both exit.  

						DISSOLVES TO:

INT. DORM- DAY

Sidney makes several trips carrying up his computer, 
monitor, and printer, a VCR, bags & boxes with food, 
clothing, bedding, and other knickknacks, and finally a 
refrigerator.  He places all the items neatly on or 
around his bed at first until he decides how to rearrange 
his half of the room.

							FADE OUT

FADE IN

INT. DORM- EVENING

Sidney has finished unpacking.  Desk is against the wall 
with the closet to the right, which is by the door.  On 
top of the desk is all his computer paraphernalia.  His 
garbage pail sits in front of his desk and beside his 
closet.  A long mirror is on the wall behind his desk.  

Along the wall, to the left of his desk, lies his bed and 
above his bed lay 2 rows of shelves.  On the side of the 
bed is a car cup holder used to hold remote controls.  
Against the back wall, where the windows are, is his 
dresser.  

On his dresser is his TV with VCR on top, perfectly 
positioned so both Sydney and Steve have equal visibility 
of the TV from their beds.  The refrigerator is to the 
left of the dresser, and Steve’s microwave is placed on 
top.

Sidney is just finishing as Steve returns.

			STEVE
	Hey!  You want to grab some dinner?  
	I’ll introduce you to some of the 
	other guys on the floor.  I've been 
	hopping from room to room while you 
	were unpacking.

			SIDNEY
	Sure. How's the food here?

			STEVE
	Don't ask!

							CUT TO:

INT. CAFETERIA- EVENING

Dinner time.  Sidney and Steve are just settling down at 
a round table with 3 other guys- PHIL, TONY, RICH.  
Everyone has a tray of food in front of them.  It doesn't 
look too appetizing.  The cafeteria is practically full.

			STEVE
	Everyone, this is my roommate Sidney.

			PHIL
	Hi.  I'm Phil, you're R-A.  How do 
	you like it here so far?

			SIDNEY
	I don't know.  I've only been here a 
	couple of hours and I spent them un-
	packing.  And I'm not going to judge 
	the rest of the campus based on the 
	looks of this food.

They all LAUGH.

			PHIL
	Good idea.  Besides the food, 
	L'Asperches U. is really great!

Phil LAUGHS.

			PHIL (CONT'D)
	Can you tell I'm an R-A?

Phil LAUGHS again and everyone else joins in.  Steve then 
points to Tony.

			STEVE
	That’s Tony.  He lives down the hall.

			TONY
	No, I’m not Italian.  My Mom just 
	thought she was being cute.  See, my 
	family’s from New Jersey but my par-
	ents had to visit a doctor in New York 
	in order to conceive.  And hence the 
	name Tony.  To New York.

			RICH
	And I’m you’re next door neighbor 
	Rich, something I’m not.

They all LAUGH.

							FADE OUT

FADE IN

INT. DORM- EVENING

Both Steve and Sidney are in bed.  The lights are off.

			STEVE
		(bragging)
	I must say I’ve had a pretty good 
	life.  I’m not one to brag about be-
	ing rich, but my parents are quite 
	well off.  I get pretty much what-
	ever I want.

			SIDNEY
	That’s nice.

			STEVE
	Yeah.  How about you?

			SIDNEY
		(in a matter of 
		fact way)
	My father died 10 years ago and my 
	mother struggles to make ends meet.

			STEVE
	Oh.  Do you have a girlfriend?

			SIDNEY
	No.  Haven’t met the right person yet.

			STEVE
	I’ve been going out with my girl-
	friend Jesse for 18 months now.  I 
	really missher.  She’s going to col-
	lege in California.

			SIDNEY
	That’s tough.

			STEVE
	Yeah.  I never thought I could love 
	someone so much.  I can’t live with-
	out her.  I wish she were here.  Are 
	you tired?  Am I keeping you up?

Sidney LAUGHS.

			SIDNEY
	Well actually... Tomorrow is a big 
	day and I would like to get some 
	sleep.

			STEVE
		(ignoring Sidney’s 
		reply)
	I met Jesse at a church picnic.  Oh, 
	she looked so beautiful and I in-
	stantly fell in love...

Sidney puts his pillow over his head to drown out his roommate.

							FADE OUT

FADE IN

INT. DORM- DAY

Sidney returns to the room after taking a shower.  He 
hangs his towel on one of the two towel racks by the 
door.  Steve’s towel and face cloth are on the other 
rack.  Steve is still sleeping.  Sidney combs his hair 
and then starts gathering his books when Steve’s ALARM 
CLOCK GOES OFF.

Steve gets out of bed and scratches his balls, a 
trademark of his.

			SIDNEY
		(his back to Steve)
	I’m going to get some breakfast be-
	fore class.  Are you...

Sidney turns around to see Steve picking his nose, 
another lovely trademark of Steve's.

			SIDNEY (CONT'D)
		(disgusted)
	...interested?

			STEVE
	No thanks.  I’m good.

			SIDNEY
	Ok.

Sidney leaves the room.

							CUT TO:

INT. DORMITORY HALLWAY- CONTINUOUS

Sidney walks a few steps down the hall when Rich exits 
his room a few doors behind Sidney.

			RICH
	Hey man!  Wait up.

Sidney turns around.

			SIDNEY
	Oh, hello.  Good morning Rich.

They continue walking down the hall.

			RICH
	So, how you like your roommate so 
	far?

Sidney LAUGHS.

			SIDNEY
	He’s probably still picking his nose 
	as we speak.

			RICH
	What?  No way!  Really?

			SIDNEY
	Yeah.  Other than that though, he 
	seems ok.

They exit the building.

							CUT TO:
INT. DORM ROOM- AFTERNOON

Sidney returns to the room after classes.  Steve is not 
there.  The air conditioner is on high.  Sidney sees that 
his wet towel is thrown in a ball on his bed.  He picks 
it up and reveals a big damp spot on his bed from where 
the towel was.

			SIDNEY
	What the fuck?!

Sidney looks over at the towel racks and sees that Steve 
has taken Sydney's rack for his face cloth.  Sidney 
removes Steve's face cloth and places it with Steve's 
towel.  Sidney reclaims the other towel rack as his own.  
Sidney then looks at the air conditioner.

			SIDNEY
	It's a beautiful day outside.  Why the 
	hell is the air on?

Sidney turns off the air and opens the window.  He then 
looks at the massive amount of pictures of Steve's 
girlfriend that cover the walls and Steve's desk.  There 
is a KNOCK on the door.

			SIDNEY
	Come in.

Rich enters.  Sidney sees Rich and then looks back at the 
pictures.

			SIDNEY
	You know, she really isn't all that 
	good looking.

			RICH
		(mockingly)
	Love knows no bounds and the famili-
	arity of 18 months breeds content.

Sidney LAUGHS.
			SIDNEY
	Ah, I see you've heard already.

			RICH
	Are you kidding?  I think the whole 
	floor knows he can't live without her.

They both LAUGH.

							CUT TO:

INT. DORM ROOM- EVENING

Both Sidney and Steve are in the room.  Sidney is sitting 
on his bed doing his homework.  Steve is doing something 
on the computer and picking his nose.  The phone RINGS 
and Steve answers.

			STEVE
		(on the phone)
	Hello?... Hi Jesse!  Oh baby, I've 
	missed you so much.

Sidney rolls his eyes and continues with his work.  Steve 
talks extremely loud, as if the phone were 10 feet away 
instead of a centimeter.  Steve lies on his bed.  
Throughout the conversation, Steve plays with his balls.

			STEVE (CONT'D)
		(on the phone)
	No... How could I look at another 
	girl when I have you?....  Of course 
	I remember our first kiss.... How 
	could I forget?

Sidney is becoming distracted by the loud conversation.

			STEVE (CONT'D)
		(on the phone)
	Oh my God... we have to wait 2 months 
	before we can see each other again... 
	I know... It's going to be so hard... 
	I love you so much...

At this point Sidney pulls out a pair of earphones, plugs 
them in the TV, and puts on a music channel while he 
attempts to continue with his homework.  

However, Steve somehow takes this as a signal to talk 
even louder.  The result being that Sidney still hears 
the conversation over the music.  Sidney looks at the 
clock- 7:30PM.

						DISSOLVE TO:

INT. DORM ROOM- EVENING

			STEVE
		(on the phone)
	No, I love you more... No, I love 
	you the most... No, I love you times 
	infinity... I love you infinity times 
	infinity...

Sidney looks at the clock again- 8:30PM.  Sidney becomes 
disgusted and frustrated.  He gives up on the homework 
and unplugs the earphones.  He begins to watch TV.

			STEVE (CONT'D)
		(on the phone)
	That's the TV hunny... My roommate 
	is listening to it extremely loud... 
	He has a hearing problem or some-
	thing...  No I won't leave the room... 
	I shouldn't have to leave my own room 
	to talk on the phone.

Sidney gets really pissed.

			SIDNEY
	Listen asshole!  I've been trying to 
	do my homework for over an hour and 
	tried everything to drown your loud 
	mouth out.  The phone is right a-
	gainst your lips.  I hate jerks like 
	you who yell as if it's a mile away.  
	I shouldn't have to leave my room to 
	do my homework either!

			STEVE
	Uhh... Uhh...

Steve gets up with the phone and leaves the room.

							FADE OUT